A how-to for the fellas: How to make a ponytail

Do guys know how to make a ponytail?

My recent encounters with the bearded-kind tell me that “No, they do not.” You see, many men who have Duck Dynasty beards also have long hair that they pull into a low ponytail at the nap of their necks. Other groups of people who opt for the long beard/low pony combo include (but are not limited to) bikers, trailer homeowners and Walmart frequenters.


I’ve never been present during the ponytail-making process but this is what I imagine.

  1. Wash hair.
  2. Apply some sort of grease that  smells like sweat.
  3. Wrap hair in ponytail.

Step 1 is completely optional and often ignored.

The result is an oily, rat tail of a pony as low as it can possibly go. It keeps these guys at their “cool” status among their peers. Well, I’m here to say that’s just not right. I’ll say what I say to my 9 year old daughter, “If you guys want to have long hair, you have to take care of it.”

Here, I’ll help. Below I’ve is a link to some steps to making a nice ponytail. TIP: You will need a brush so you better head to Walmart.

I hope I make a difference.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s