Not that B word. I’m talking about “Bully.” Although, at times, the other b-word could apply. I know the word Bully is being thrown around like crazy, but it applies here. I’m not saying we need to file a restraining order, I’m just saying… there’s this bully.
Anya is being picked on by a boy at school. I actually think he likes her but you wouldn’t think so by the way he talks to her. You definitely don’t call someone fat if you like them, right? (If you do, you’re doing it wrong).
I had a bad feeling when she saw her class list said “Great. So-and-so is in my class.” (She didn’t say so-and-so. I’m protecting the alleged from public scrutiny. As if he’d do my daughter the same courtesy.)
Anya’s been in school about a week and 3 out of 5 of those days, she’s come home complaining about So-and-so.
Day 1: She said, “Teacher told us to ignore each other.”
“That’s good,” I thought. Although if I were the teacher, I’d probably try to therapize it out (could be why I’m not a teacher).
Day 2: Anya said, “So-and-so kept screaming at me at recess so I told the teacher. We both got in trouble.”
Not sure about the method here. I’m guessing the teacher didn’t know who started it so, by default, it’s everyone’s fault.
Day 3: Anya said, “So-and-so is talking about me just loud enough so I can hear and quiet enough so the teacher can’t hear.” When I asked her what she did about it she said, “I just ignored him. I don’t want to get into trouble.” Me. “Did it work?” Anya, “No, he kept writing notes and throwing them on my desk. One said the M-F word.”
Me, “Ok, what the hell? I’ll calling his bitch-ass” (that’s where the other B-word comes in). If you’re wondering. No, I didn’t call him. Donnie reminded me that when he got bullied in school, his mom called the kids parents and they just went at it 10-fold. I definitely don’t want that.
So said to Anya, “What are you going to school for?”
She replied, “To learn.”
I said, “Then just focus on that. If he interferes with your ability to learn, let me know and we’ll talk to your teacher. Until then, just write it down in your journal when he torments you.”
I figured, if we do talk to the teacher, I want to have documentation of these events, rather than just emotional recounts, you know, in case we need to file a restraining order.